In its latest recruitment drive, the British Army have rolled out the SJW mat to attract all manner of folk afflicted with angst-filled ennui, who, at the same time, apparently want to be efficient killing machines.

On their YouTube channel (ARMYjobs), they lay out various scenarios of emotional individuals yearning to be free from their ho-hum, highly-offending, non-army careers. This new SJW drive is aimed at the following five ‘communities’, each with its own nurturing, zen-filled video (see below):

1. Muslims
2. Women
3. Wimps (‘weaklings‘)
4. Poets (‘emotional people‘)
5. Homosexuals

In the ‘UK Army Biannual Diversity Statistics‘ for October 2017 (yes, that is a thing thanks to the UK’s Equality Act¹), we can see just how well the diversification of the armed forces are progressing. For just the army (the other forces are also listed), 10.3% are women, 11.0% are black or minority ethnic, and 14.7% are non-heterosexual. Also listed are declared religious affiliation, with only 2.7% neither Christian nor atheist (Muslims are at 0.4%). For some strange reason, statistics on wimps and poets are not compiled.

The active militaries of selected countries makes for an interesting comparison, considering that the UK has 150,00 currently in all its forces (80,000 in the army):

• China: 2.2 million (1st)
• United States: 1.4 million (3rd)
• France: 203,000 (24th)
• Germany: 177,000 (28th)
• UK: 150,000 (33rd)
• Canada: 63,000 (57th)

As for the past, the historical size of the British army is as follows:

• 1793: 40,000
• 1813: 250,000 (Battle of Waterloo)
• 1838: 90,000 (Congress of Vienna requirement)
• 1856: 250,000 (Crimean War)
• 1902: 350,000 (Boer War)
• 1917: 4.2 million (WWI)
• 1944: 4.5 million (WWII – all forces)
• 1951: 1 million (end of conscription)
• 1961: 500,000
• 1991: 300,000
• 2017: 80,000

So – what of the future? The military, like all other state institutions, is marching inexorably towards some dark, dystopian daymare where everyone is safely labelled, inclusively employed and non-triggered. The military, which had one of the easiest-to understand-mandates – kill and defend extremely well – doesn’t seem to know what it’s new mandate is supposed to be. Fair? Easy? Relaxed? A place to chill? Not exactly Churchill. Not exactly Dunkirk. But then again, there’s always the movies I suppose.

Muslims

Women

Wimps

Poets

Homosexuals

¹ UK Army Biannual Diversity Statistics, 1 October 2017